HUMANCENTi. PAD - Full Episode - Season 1. Ep 0. 1- OH, MY GOD! ISN'T IT AWESOMEHAVING AN i.

PAD, YOU GUYS? HEY, BEBE,WHERE'S YOUR i. PAD? OH, RIGHT. YOU'RE NOT COOL ENOUGH.

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HA HA HA HA! HEY, HEY, YOU SEENMY i. PAD, TOKEN? FUNNY, YOU DON'T SEEMTO HAVE ONE. I THOUGHT YOUR FAMILYWAS RICH! HA HA! YOU DUMBASSES HAVETO PLAY FOUR SQUAREBECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE i. PADS! OH, WHAT SHOULD I DOON MY i.

PAD NEXT? THINK I'LL EMAILSOME OF MY FRIENDS. OH NO, WAIT. MAYBE I'LL DOWNLOADSOME MORE COOL APPS! THIS IS SO AWESOME!- TOM SALTZMAN SAYS YOU DON'TREALLY HAVE AN i. PAD.- WHAT?- TOM SALTZMAN SAYS YOU JUSTGLUED A PIECE OF GLASSTO AN i. PAD COVERAND YOU'RE FAKING IT.- TOM SALTZMAN'S DADIS AN ALCOHOLICWHO DRINKS AND DRIVES!- LET ME SEE YOUR i. PAD,CARTMAN.- SERIOUSLY, YOU GUYS,TOM SALTZMAN'S DADIS A DRUNK DRIVER!

HE'S THE ONEWHO RAN OVER JOEY POTTS' DOGBECAUSE JOEY POTTS DOESN'TKNOW HOW TO TAKE CAREOF HIS ANIMALS, WHICH IS WHYHE GETS BEAT BY HIS MOM.- JUST LET US SEEYOUR i. PAD, CARTMAN.- NO, BECAUSETHE BATTERY'S DEAD,IT JUST RAN OUT OF POWER!- SO PLUG IT IN.- I LEFT MY CHARGER AT HOME! FINE! I'M GONNA GO HOMEAND CHARGE MY i. PADAND BRING IT TOMORROW,AND YOU GUYS ARE GONNA FEELREALLY STUPID! WELL, GOOD GOING, MOM. YOU'VE COMPLETELYSCREWED ME OVER!- WHAT HAPPENED, ERIC?- YOU SAID I HAD TO WAIT TILLMY BIRTHDAY TO GET AN i. PAD,SO THE ONE I RUBBED INEVERYONE'S FACES TODAYISN'T REAL, AND TOMORROWEVERYONE'S GONNA CALL MEA LIAR.

WOULD YOU MIND LOANING MESOME OF YOUR LIPSTICK, MOM? BECAUSE I WANNAAT LEAST LOOK PRETTYTHE NEXT TIME YOU DECIDETO FUCK ME! AND THEN I CAN TAKEALL MY HOMEWORK ON MY i.

PAD,AND SWIPE IT OVERTO MY i. PHONE.- UH, YEAH, APPLE STUFFIS PRETTY NEAT, ALL RIGHT. I JUST DON'T WANTANY BIG COMPANYTRACKING WHERE I AMAT ALL TIMES.- AW, THAT'S JUST A RUMOR.

THEY DON'T REALLY TRACK YOU.- HERE HE IS! HELLO, KYLE. WE'RE FROM APPLE. WE'RE ALL READY FOR YOU NOW.- WHAT? READY FOR WHAT?- TO FULFILL THE AGREEMENT. CAN WE GET A WEIGHT,PLEASE?- 8. POUNDS, SIR.- WHAT AGREEMENT?- 8. POUNDS, GOOD. LET'S GET THE BLOOD WORK.- HEY, YOU CAN'T DO THAT!- YOU AGREED WE COULD TAKEALL THE BLOOD WE NEEDED.- WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?- WHEN YOU DOWNLOADEDTHE LAST i.

TUNES UPDATE,A WINDOW ON YOUR SCREENPOPPED UPAND ASKED IF YOU AGREEDTO OUR TERMS AND CONDITIONS. YOU CLICKED ! HEY YOU!- AAH! DAD! DAD, I NEED A LAWYER!- KYLE, WHAT ARE YOUDOING HERE?- DAD, IF YOU AGREETO SOMETHINGBUT YOU DIDN'T MEAN TOAGREE TO IT,WHAT DO YOU DO?- WELL, KYLE, IT'S ALWAYSTHE AGREEING PARTY'SRESPONSIBILITYTO KNOWWHAT THEY ARE SIGNING.- BUT IT'S LIKEEIGHT PAGES LONGAND THEY SEND ME A NEW ONELIKE EVERY THREE WEEKS! HOW CAN THEY KNOW IF I- -- CALM DOWN, KYLE. IT'S OKAY. YOU'RE SAFE WITH DADDY.- HERE HE IS.- AAH!- COME ON, YOU!- HEY, WHAT THE HECKIS GOING ON?- YOUR SON HAS MADEA BINDINGAND LEGAL AGREEMENTWITH APPLE, SIR.- AN AGREEMENT TO DO WHAT?- APPLE'S INNER WORKINGSARE TOP SECRET TO ALL USERS. YOU KNOW HOW IT IS.- NO, I DON'T KNOW HOW IT IS. I USE A PC.- ! RIGHT.

WHO JUST AGREES TOSOMETHING THEY DON'T READ?- AND NOW, THE PRESIDENTOF APPLE, STEVE JOBS! I'M GONNA CLICK ON.. DECLINE.- WELL, THAT DOES IT!

I'M GOING TO THE POLICE.- FOR WHAT?- TO FIND OUT WHERE APPLEIS KEEPING MY SON!- DUDE, WHEN THE POLICE WANTTO KNOW WHERE SOMEBODY IS,THEY ASK APPLE. THE ONLY WAYWE CAN FIX ALL THISIS BY GOING TO THE HIGHESTAUTHORITY ON THE PLANET. YOU GUYS, WE ARE GONNAHAVE TO ASK HELP FROM..

THE GENIUSES.- THE GENIUSES!- ? NANDA KORE?- REALLY NICE, GUYS. I REMEMBER WHEN THE FIRSTVERSION OF THE i. PAD CAME OUT. PEOPLE COULDN'T BELIEVEHOW EASY IT WASTO TAKE THEIR VIDEOS,MUSIC, AND PHOTOS,AND ALL THEIR SHITAND SHARE ITWITH OTHER PEOPLEWHO COULD DO THE SAMEWITH ALL THEIR SHIT. THE ONLY THINGTHE i. PAD COULDN'T DOWAS WALK OR READ..

UNTIL NOW.- . YOU DON'T WANTTO BE PART OF THIS,THEN JUST SIGN RIGHT HERE. NO! YOU DIDN'T READ IT! THIS SAYS WE DON'T EVERHAVE TO LET YOU OUTAND THAT WE CAN DOWHATEVER WE WANT! DAMN IT! WHY WON'T IT READ?!- IT'S PROBABLY LOW ON POWER. WE SHOULD FEED IT.- ALL RIGHT, HERE YOU GO. COME ON.- NO! I WILL NOT EATIF THEY ARE FORCEDTO EAT MY POO!- PERHAPSI DIDN'T MENTION..

IT'S A BEAN AND CHEESEBURRITO FROM PACO'S.- OH! SORRY, KYLE. I TRY TO RESIST,BUT BURRITOIS TOO DELICIOUS!! OH, NO! FEEL SICK!- ! PHIL,WHOSE MOTHER CONSTANTLY TRIESTO FUCK HIM.- I WANT YOU ALLTO MEET ERIC CARTMAN,WHO IS A VERY SPECIAL BOYWITH A VERY HARD LIFE. ERIC, YOU SAY THAT.. YOUR MOM FUCKS YOU?- YES!

SHE FUCK ME SO HARD!- DOES THIS HAPPEN OFTEN? DOES SHE- -DOES SHE FUCK YOU A LOT?- DUDE, FILIPINO HOOKERSDON'T GET FUCKEDTHE WAY I DO. AWW!- NOW, I KNOW THIS ISVERY DIFFICULTFOR YOU TO TALK ABOUT,BUT WHERE WAS THE LAST TIMEYOUR MOTHER FUCKED YOU?- AT BEST BUY. AWW!- YOUR MOTHER FUCKED YOUAT BEST BUY?- UH- HUH.- AND PEOPLE SAW HERDOING THIS?- YES!- AND THEY DIDN'T DOANYTHING?- NO!- ERIC, STOP IT!- OH, THERE SHE IS! THERE'S MY MOM RIGHT NOW! BOO!- BOO!- ERIC, YOU COME HOMERIGHT NOW!

BOO!- MA'AM, WHY DO YOU THINKIT'S OKAY TO FUCK YOUR SON?- I DON'T!- SHE DOES! SHE DOES IT ALL THE TIME! SHE FUCKED ME ON CHRISTMAS! SHE FUCKED ME ON MY BIRTHDAY!!

THANK YOU! THANK YOU!- SHH! COME ON, HURRY! WE HAVE AN AMBULANCEWAITING OUTSIDE! JUST TRY TO STAY CALM. WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO TRY TOGET YOU SEPARATED RIGHT AWAY!- YES, PLEASE HURRY! Download Naruto Shippuden English Dubbed Episode 1 on this page.

THAT CUTTLEFISH AND ASPARAGUSIS NOT SITTING WELL!- WE GOT IT, WE GOT IT! DOCTOR, CAN YOU TAKETHIS THING APART?- IF I'M GOING TO PERFORMSURGERY, I NEED PERMISSION. SIGN THIS RELEASESO WE CAN OPERATE!- !

HERE IT COMES! OH, IT'S GOINGTO BE A LOT! HOLD ON, KYLE! I BELIEVE IN YOU! STUNT,APPLE HAS JOINED UPWITH BEST BUY AND DR.

PHILTO DONATE THE FIRST CENTi. PADTO A NEEDY BOYWHO WAS RAPED BY HIS MOTHER.- IN ALL MY YEARS,I'VE NEVER HEARDA MORE TRAGIC STORYTHAN THAT OF ERIC CARTMAN. AND I WANT TO THANKTHE APPLE COMPANYFOR HELPING US MAKE TODAYA VERY SPECIAL DAY FOR HIM. PHILCONTACTED US AT APPLEWITH ERIC'S STORY,WE KNEW WE HADTO GET ONBOARD. AND SO, ERIC, HERE ISYOUR VERY OWN..

HUMANCENTi. PAD!! FINALLY! HOW DO WE DO THAT?- IT'S VERY EASY. YOU'LL SIMPLY NEEDTO JOIN APPLE.- NO! I DON'T WANTTO JOIN APPLE. I LIKE MY PC.- BUT IF YOU JOIN,WE CAN MAKE YOUR SON'SACCOUNT INTO A FAMILY ACCOUNT,AND THEN YOU HAVE TOi.

APPROVE ALL HIS AGREEMENTS.- COME ON,IT'S NOT THAT BIG A DEAL. WILL YOU JUST STOP RESISTINGAND JOIN THE REST OF USIN THE FUTURE?- UGH!

ALL RIGHT, FINE. I'LL SIGN UP WITH APPLE.- KAL- IF- FEE!- GERALD BROFLOVSKI,DO YOU AGREE TO LET APPLETRACK YOUR LOCATIONAT ALL TIMES?- . JOBS, YOU HAVE DONESO MUCH FOR THE WORLD. YOU HAVE HELPED CONNECTEVERYONE TO EACH OTHER.

CLEARLY, THIS IS THE FUTURE. BUT- -BUT CAN'TWE JUST SLOW DOWNAND ENJOY THE PRESENTA LITTLE LONGER?- YOU KNOW SOMETHING? I AGREE. audience: AWW!- MWAH!- COME ON, WE'LL GET YOUSEPARATED, LITTLE BOY. GUESS YOU WON'T BE EATINGJAPANESE FOODFOR A WHILE, HUH?! GO AHEAD, MOM,FUCK ME! FUCK ME RIGHT HEREIN THE BEST BUY.

YOU WANNA FUCKYOUR SON SO BAD? GO ON MOM FUCK ME!